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leesah-likes

(a memoir)

#09

2009-04-19

pain

I want to feel the sting, the bitter burn that�s rough, acrid, mine. The pain means existence and importance, it means that it could have been pleasure, that there was the razor-edge potentiality and grandness, and it went the other way; the discomfort means being alive.

I want to get hurt because then it means that my heart was open enough to let it happen, means that someone tried and I tried and that there was some inter-action and that is living.

But instead of all this, I�ve got no nicks and scratches, no marks of something, anything. Instead of all this, I am painfully painless.

leesah-likes at 5:29 p.m.

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