2007-03-05
placeb-no
You�re like a placebo.
It wasn�t you that made me better, no matter how much I wanted to believe. It was truly me, with the awesomely oblivious powers of my mind.
�It�s a tough metaphor that popped into my head just today. I don�t think I could apply it to my life- it seems inherently dramatic. I�m still trying to wriggle my way through it.
I like songs with the soft muted tone of a trumpet.
I realize I miss people and places and things (my climbing tree at Woodland), but I don�t actively long for them. In some ways, I�m kind of complacent about life. I think that is alright for now.
I get to revisit some stuff in a little over a week. Another refresher, it will be: this is where you came from; these are a lot of reminders of who you used to be, and who you still are in many ways.
I get to watch the sunset camber across the Rockies. That will be lovely.
I�m faced with a blinking cursor and nothing really to offer it as of right now, nothing I feel too compelled to write about here. That�s okay, I�ve had worse entries. Not recently, though. Most of my poor entries are from years ago. Sometimes when I go back and read them I slightly cringe, but never feel compelled to edit or delete them. I can let the convoluted past stand as it was recorded in my odd mind.
I wonder if I really do have metaphorical placebos in my life. It�s a twisted sense of self-strength, because it doesn�t know it is helping itself, it relies on another assigned source as the treatment, but without the belief of that treatment it could not help itself. I think I�m pretty much not that way? Maybe I�ll have to tangle myself over other weird comparisons in the future instead.
You�re like a postage stamp.
Or something like that.
leesah-likes at 4:40 p.m.