2006-09-13
"still?"
There are large, red comfy couches in the library. I recommend them to no one who actually wants to get studying done.
Origin of Species is not a promising abstract. I quote the editor's note: "In his autobiography he [Darwin] says that there appeared to be an innate defect in his mind leading him to always in the first instance to express an idea in the most awkward possible form."
Yeah. That's pretty much accurate.
It's so weird to just stare at a text. You can note the intricacies of each printed letter and see the minute texture of the paper; examine the black ink and how the light reflects it. You can pretend you can't read it, that you haven't been trained most of your life to associate those squiggly shapes with corresponding ideas. You can pretend, or that can actually sort of happen.
It's like how people are physically out of shape. I'm out of mind.
Hopefully if I keep pretending to study, it'll actually happen.
The leaves here are already starting to change colours. Their red splotches are speckled with yellow and green. It's really nice.
People are nice, too. I keep meeting more, but I best like the ones I've already met. I've almost been here a week.
It feels like longer.
Sometimes when I'm walking across campus, I just want to impulsively call Petie and tell her little snippets of my day. Petie, you should see my philosophy professor. He speaks so slowly and pensively. He made a really awesome analogy today that made me smile hugely. Petie, there's a guy here that looks like Julian. It's so weird. He's from Valentine, Nebraska.. wherever that is. I could tell her about the cute guys here and provide ample reasons for why my roommate rocks. I wish she could see.
I have psychology to finish up. My teacher says it's easy for people to over-estimate their understanding of the material. I don't want to over-estimate anything. In a way, I feel that's not really possible. I don't think I could over-estimate anything here; everything seems to exceed my imagination of it in every facet.
I look in your face and see so much beauty. Not "at" your face, but in it. Past it, and through it. I am surrounded by this beauty and I hope I can give it off myself. This is more abstract than I can explain.
I need to sing more. I need to stop being this fragmented in presenting my thoughts. I need to indulge my romantic whims, and sing out my melodies. I want to just drift.
....Psychology: Predictive Value of the Conditioned Stimulus. Oh yes.
leesah-likes at 7:30 p.m.