2005-07-14
i used to think maybe
I'm walking on sunshine.
Well, not really, but that song is now even more cool.
Lizz appreciates my memories. That makes me happy. We bought dollar buttons made from vintage scarves.
She saw places and things in my life with fresh eyes, and seemed to think I have it good and I am lucky with how things are for me.
I have to take my own word for it. Hers mean a lot but I know that it has to be mine that really counts in my own life.
there's this mosquito bite on my stomach and it really itches.
i should stop writing about sunsets for a while.
i've got pictures to post, i'll do that tomorrow or something.
This parade of boys my age-ish came into work today. I jokingly asked if they were a boy scout troop. No, they laughed, we go to a school in Marion. I forgot how they put it. They didn't say "rehab," and I was the one to say "delinquent;" they may have said "troubled." There is supposedly a big, immaculate private school in Marion for teens from all over the country, the type who may have disdemeanors or untrusting parents. I think Vera's parents work for the school. I'd like to visit it some day. I think it's highly secured, though. They all seemed nice. I should have talked more, but I had fifteen cones to scoop for them. I am intriuged.
I should study for the SAT's. Do you know how much that sucks? I don't like it. I don't want to spend my time doing it. It seems hopeless, futile, useless. I don't need to say much more about it, at least not until I feel like complaining. You must know that my score will never be good enough.
I guess I won't see Eric for a long time. That kind of bites. I can have a lot of fun with him. I remember some of the stuff we did, and it makes me happy. He's always been fun. Oh well.
I'm ready, I'm waiting.
I miss playing tetris on my gameboy. I think it's broke. That was so fun.
All of my next paycheck goes to a hotel room in Chicago so I can look at Northwestern and U of Chicago.
I wish I had a dog.
I should call Kristine.
I hope things are all okay with Petie. It somehow seems less simple.
I don't think I appreciate how things are right now. The car, the late nights, sunsets, the screwing off at work, reading and vegging in the sun, all of it. My mom is trying to change that. She is kindly making it difficult for me to do things and is depriving me of some of the aforementioned goodness. Cleaning. Curfew. ugly c-words they are. We've already discussed this, we won't do that here any further.
Maybe I should not have done that survey thing. Everyone does. I suppose they are boring and annoying. I feel obligated to read through them. I mostly scan. Maybe if people were more insightful. I don't know. call me.
The moon is growing.
yes, i am alive. i feel and think so much, i Am. i want to live so much. i'll try to give up, i will. you must understand. sun soaking tomorrow. i want to be alone but not lonely. time will tell, it always does. sleep well, there is love.
leesah-likes at 12:04 a.m.