2004-07-19
twosday
your entry was the best that i've read in a while from anybody. just to let you know, work sucked and i was really in a crapass mood today until you came in. screw gloating by either of us, i was just sincerely glad to see you. the jukebox played this stupid song by the beach boys that contained the lyrics "to girls for every one" earlier. it made me feel sick. it somehow relieved me to see you, it made you more palpable. of course that sounds stupid, how couldn't it?! and you would hate me if i told you that i understand. don't think i wasn't thinking about you last night, too. and no doubts the person i conversed with was thinking about you, too. you could have gotten online at any time i predicted, in fact i was waiting for your arrival. you were there, in some form. that's why it was so hard to hear that i was "persuasive" when i didn't even DO anything! of course it's all my fault, (i mean this. this is NOT sarcasm), but that doesn't mean that i did anything! look, i like you. i really, really do. matching vests aversions to similiar people and affections to similiar people as well i guess. i regret not knowing you sooner. i regret not knowing ALL of you sooner. because then you might not be doubting my character. i have a gift for you too, you know. it was a gift to me actually, and as soon as i saw it, i knew i wanted to give it to you. it will match the asparagus, i believe. i don't want to leave like this, i want to talk to you but you won't email like i ask you to! well, for once this is about a different "you." not that same you i kept thinking of all the time. while i brushed my teeth. remember, we talked about all of this during lunch. "apparently" (that WORD!) we did not say enough. but you like it, you like the pronouns. so i beseech all of them unto YOU. take them, you got the best ones anyway, trust me. i told you i wasn't working tomorrow, i said i was off. this you knew. you think i know more than i do, and i really DON'T KNOW. all i know is about some boulder and mind-imploding fireworks. i hate drama, i hate that you openly referred to it as that, i hate that i don't know what "it" is. speaking of drama, you sure are quick on the rebound. that looks a lot more accusatory than it really is. what is going to happen to buttons? what is going to happen to envy? envy is very very green, reminding me of you of course. tomorrow is yours. this is obvious and directed towards two. i don't fit in with it, i just wish really badly that i did. i think in some form i will be present though. present, gift, hah. so maybe i will see "you" and we can exchange items. little trinkets to be given to one another. how profound. and you take me for a cynic, but i honestly can't wait. tuesday is yours, miss whatev', at least it was two weeks ago. timing seems to be everything. let's have a clock-bashing fest, office space style. althought i doubt you would be up for it. maybe twosday will be for more than one. (i may have to go professional on this conundrum business. blast... conundrum!)
leesah-likes at 5:12 p.m.